Are you an old geezer if:

[jeremyp]

Are you an old geezer if:
1. You hate people with headphones singing on the gym machine next to you.
2. You hate old geezers who talk in movies.
3. You think Jesse Williams’ socks are cool.
4. You suffer from IVF’s (involuntary flatulence) when doing sit ups in the gym and there is (always) a younger person of the opposite sex nearby.
5. You resent the torrent coming from the 10 year old next to you at the urinal.
6. Tight skin annoys you.
7. You have to think about taking longer steps.
8. You drive around to find the nearest parking space to the gym door, then do a 3 mile workout.
9. You talk to an empty chair.

[Marlow]

Are you an old geezer if:
1. You hate people with headphones singing on the gym machine next to you.
2. You hate old geezers who talk in movies.
3. You think Jesse Williams’ socks are cool.
4. You suffer from IVF’s (involuntary flatulence) when doing sit ups in the gym and there is (always) a younger person of the opposite sex nearby.
5. You resent the torrent coming from the 10 year old next to you at the urinal.
6. Tight skin annoys you.
7. You have to think about taking longer steps.
8. You drive around to find the nearest parking space to the gym door, then do a 3 mile workout.
9. You talk to an empty chair.

I am an old geezer, but
1. no
2. no, I hate people texting on their cell.
3. no
4. no
5. no
6. no
7. yes
8. no, I look for the shady spot.
9. that's just Clint

[Rye Catcher]

Too many assumptions about the gym

1. Anyone walking around in public with headsets on should be shot.
2. Wait a bit and watch on your big screen HD TV. Fart to your hearts content.
3. Who is Jessie Williams and who cares?
4. Farting is how geezers prevent bloating.
5. Your taller than he is, just turn in his direction and piss on him.
6. Tight skin? If you bend over far enough, all the skin on your ass will appear tight.
7. Walk around it.
8. Use your handicap sticker and cut out that old granny from that nifty spot close in at the market. She can user her walker.
9. Of course, you don't want that bastard talking back.

Marlow does not have a clue. Too many days at sea.

[Bruce Kritzler]

3. no, but I like Erik Kinyard's.

[Marlow]

Marlow does not have a clue. Too many days at sea.

In my 20 years in Uncle Sam's Canoe Club, I spent MAYBE 6 days at sea . . . so there!

[odelltrclan]

Are you an old geezer if:
1. You hate people with headphones singing on the gym machine next to you.
2. You hate old geezers who talk in movies.
3. You think Jesse Williams’ socks are cool.
4. You suffer from IVF’s (involuntary flatulence) when doing sit ups in the gym and there is (always) a younger person of the opposite sex nearby.
5. You resent the torrent coming from the 10 year old next to you at the urinal.
6. Tight skin annoys you.
7. You have to think about taking longer steps.
8. You drive around to find the nearest parking space to the gym door, then do a 3 mile workout.
9. You talk to an empty chair.

Thanks for this post. They say laughter is the best medicine and this gave me some good medicine today!! And I am not even to 50 yet.

2. I hate when anyone talks during movies.
4. More places than just the gym unfortunately!
5. Not just the 10 year old, but anyone who still has the ability.

How about all those annoying SOB's who wear their pants in such a manner as to allow us to see most, if not all of their underwear.

[Marlow]

How about all those annoying SOB's who wear their pants in such a manner as to allow us to see most, if not all of their underwear.

Yeah, how silly is this?
http://thegrio.files.wordpress.com/2011 ... .jpg?w=488

On the other hand, people object to my fashion sense too . . .
http://www.fengtastic.com/wp-content/up ... ndpa-1.jpg

[odelltrclan]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The funny thing about those pictures. The kids think it is cool. The old guys realize it may not be, but they just don't care. Maybe it something that is earned after putting up with the world for so many years.

[lonewolf]

At 81, (or is it 82?) I qualify as an old geezer on most counts enumerated. Except for the "old" part.

But, to pick a nit: The thread is phrased as a question. Are these jeremey's personal annoyances and he is asking if they qualify him for geezerhood? Or, is he seeking solace in knowng that others of a certain age share his idiosyncracies?

Some are symptoms of geezerness, some are applicable to all ages but the list is far from exhaustive. In fact, exhaustion is a common trait among geezers.

As is:
Disapproval of: Ostentatious consumption.
Waste of anything that is still useful.
Overly exuberant public displays of affection.
Much/most of what passes for music and entertainment now-a-days.
Excessive and disfiguring piercing and tattoos.

And, most important: Soccer replacing baseball as the national youth sport. (Admittedly, they get more exercise but, somehow, it just ain't American.

[jeremyp]

How about all those annoying SOB's who wear their pants in such a manner as to allow us to see most, if not all of their underwear.

Yeah, how silly is this?
http://thegrio.files.wordpress.com/2011 ... .jpg?w=488

On the other hand, people object to my fashion sense too . . .
http://www.fengtastic.com/wp-content/up ... ndpa-1.jpg

[jeremyp]

5. Your taller than he is, just turn in his direction and piss on him.

Tried that. My hearing comes up Monday.

6. Tight skin? If you bend over far enough, all the skin on your ass will appear tight.

But then my belly sags.

[jeremyp]

At 81, (or is it 82?) I qualify as an old geezer on most counts enumerated. Except for the "old" part.

But, to pick a nit: The thread is phrased as a question. Are these jeremey's personal annoyances and he is asking if they qualify him for geezerhood? Or, is he seeking solace in knowng that others of a certain age share his idiosyncracies?

Seeking solace, and permission. If YOU, at 81, are a geezer then maybe I'm (at 71) a geezerling.

[Marlow]

Excessive and disfiguring piercing and tattoos.

That makes me sad. I hope that when they're my age, they still 'appreciate' what they've done to themselves, but something tells me they won't. The corrective medical procedures will be pricey, but by then, maybe they'll have tons of money, but again, I think not.
I try very, very hard not to 'judge' people who look hideous in this regard, trying to tell myself it's just my own geezerly issue, not theirs, but deep down I'm convinced it comes from their misguided belief that the piercings/tats make them singularly unique, when, of course, just the opposite is true, they are following, lemming-like, their peers down the rat-hole of, as you call it, disfigurement. They are shouting out, "Look at me and how cool I must be because I don't buy into your bourgeois conformity", while strictly conforming to their own outre peer group (of literally millions).
Oh well, this is no different that the generation that preceded me (60s love children) who hated our long hair and rock'n'roll devil's music!

[jeremyp]

True story. Showed post to my wife who started laughing and gave vent to an.....IVF.

[Helen S]

So why is it socially acceptable for women to punch holes in their ears and their daughters ears but some people frown on this for men?

Another question here- posed to me by a non-track fan (she watches it If I do, but would not choose that on her own)- Why do virtually all women runners bare their midriff but no men do?
I could see that in really hot conditions, it makes sense and the men should follow suit, but we were watching a cool and rainy meet where only a few women wore the full body suits, while most women wore bikini briefs and a bare midriff.

[Marlow]

So why is it socially acceptable for women to punch holes in their ears and their daughters ears but some people frown on this for men?

First of all, I think getting little girls' ears pierced is indeed child abuse!
Walk around a college campus and you'll see how NOT 'frowned upon' men's earrings are.
Yuo answered your own question. The answer is because it IS socially more acceptable. Things are normal if enough people do it. When I go to Wal-Mart I see some VERY strange things that don't cause overt stares from anyone (mine is in my mind). Browse this site for an education:

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/

[no one]

one of my occasional 'games' is to see if I can find any players without a tattoo on televised NBA games. That, in and of itself, qualifies as geezerhood. Likewise with college games although that's easier to detect.

[jeremyp]

As to Tats. I have a friend, old navy guy, in his early 70's, with both arms mapped with artistry. The facial jewelry however perplexes me. "How do they kiss? How do they roll over in bed? How does your dentist get around that tongue? Do you even have a dentist?

[Marlow]

How does your dentist get around that tongue? Do you even have a dentist?

The infection rate on tongue-piercings is alarmingly high.
I wonder about nose rings. How is what's going on inside the nose NOT disgusting with a stud in there too?
Or eyebrow ring. Do you really want an infection near your EYES?
We shan't even mention some of the other places that get pierced!

[Pego]

one of my occasional 'games' is to see if I can find any players without a tattoo on televised NBA games. That, in and of itself, qualifies as geezerhood. Likewise with college games although that's easier to detect.

There was a guy in my battalion that was tattooed top-to-bottom. On his neck over the large vessels he had a tattooed line with a caption "cut here." The best was his foreskin, a tattoo of a bee.

[lonewolf]

Just came from pharmacy where a very attractive, friendly, efficient young woman( 30s) assistant/clerk, who wears long sleeves and high necks in winter, was wearing a low neck, sleeveless top. Every visible square inch is colorfully tattooed from her clavical/shoulders to her wrists, much like the girl on American Pickers.
Dunno what she does off duty but she would look right in place on the back seat of a motorcycle... but she is nice and remembers my name..just don't understand what a smart, attractive young woman is thinking to go to all that trouble, pain and expense to create an unfavorable first impresson. :

[Conor Dary]

just don't understand what a smart, attractive young woman is thinking to go to all that trouble, pain and expense to create an unfavorable first impresson. :

I always think that myself. I suppose if you hang out with idiots who think that is great then there you go.

[Conor Dary]

Then there is this idiot:

http://ricks.foreignpolicy.com/posts/20 ... n_a_tattoo

[Marlow]

a tattoo of a bee.

And you know this because . . . ?
Never mind - TMI!

[Pego]

a tattoo of a bee.

And you know this because . . . ?
Never mind - TMI!

I was his physician. They get to see things, remember ?

[spinoza]

There was a guy in my battalion that was tattooed top-to-bottom. On his neck over the large vessels he had a tattooed line with a caption "cut here." The best was his foreskin, a tattoo of a bee.

Enough, by itself, to overcome my objections to circumcision.

[no one]

tattoo and piercing queen: Dennis Rodman. And a great defensive player.

[jeremyp]

one of my occasional 'games' is to see if I can find any players without a tattoo on televised NBA games. That, in and of itself, qualifies as geezerhood. Likewise with college games although that's easier to detect.

There was a guy in my battalion that was tattooed top-to-bottom. On his neck over the large vessels he had a tattooed line with a caption "cut here." The best was his foreskin, a tattoo of a bee.

What's the going rate for touching someone else's prepuce, let alone tatooing it?

[preston]

1. you say "PR", personal record, instead of "PB", personal best. Yes that would be you, gh!
2. you list "AR" as American Record instead of "area record". Yup, gh, again! Try "NR"
3. you want field events to be in imperial instead of metric. Get over it!
4. "Pre" who?
5. FAT
6. Jordan, Bowerman, Elliott, Winter...self-explanatory
7. Soviet Union means a LOT to you.
8. cinders, steel poles, sawdust...self-explanatory
9. You were a member of AAU or TAC
10. you give a damn about the mile

[lonewolf]

Got me covered.

[tandfman]

you refer to jeans as dungarees.

(I broke myself of that lifelong habit a few decades ago, when I found that my use of that word tended to stop all conversations cold and cause the people I was with to stare at me as if I had just stepped out of a time machine.)

[gh]

dungarees, I'm thinking, was also very much a regionalism.

[tandfman]

dungarees, I'm thinking, was also very much a regionalism.

What say you on this, lonewolf?

[lonewolf]

If so, the term "dungarees" never reached my region.

Pre-WWII, most rural boys in Oklahoma wore bib overalls. (Roundhouse and OshKosh) As jeans came into favor, we would buckle the shoulder straps around our waist in imitation of jeans, commonly called Levis because that was the prevailing brand.
I spent the first 21 years of my life in Oklahoma wearing overalls and "blue jeans". The next 60 years living in 8 states and 2 foreign countries. I have read the term "dungarees", without knowing exactly what type trousers/pants it referred to but I do not recall ever hearing "jeans" called dungarees.

[Conor Dary]

In an episode of The Rockford Files, the plot of the story involves a secret Russian formula for long wearing jeans. The Navy officer who is involved in the story calls them dungarees.