Interesting you should mention this because my better half got a cold call a couple days back from a cleaning company who wanted to demonstrate their services in our house, i.e. vacuum the place. My partner explained that we got rid of our carpets, so there was nothing to vacuum. So they wanted to vacuum our beds! Talk about not taking no for an answer. But here's the kicker: It wasn't a cold call at all. The company had been given our number by (you may have guessed) my partner's sister, who knows we don't have carpets! What an airhead.
im never on long enough to find out. any phone call that starts with
" mr. c aarr.. nney? HOW ARE YOU TODAY!?
i used to say nicely " no thanks ". now i slam the phone down as hard as i can without breaking it.
i like the guy who was staying at a hotel where there was a telemarketer convention. he found out their room numbers and called then at 3 am to sell them something the didnt need. " hi, how are you doing today. do i know what time it is? of course i do. its time to talk insurance!"
I don't really understand the question. Isn't that why we all have voicemail and, before that, answering machines? If I ever do pick up in error because I am expecting a call and someone starts off by asking me how I am, I usually say "That depends."
Three other annoying telephone bits. Business and personal voicemail greetings that you can't bypass and leave a message by hitting pound or a number or something. Some can be as long as a minute. People calling you and announcing the time and date when they leave their message(It's 10am, Tuesday, November 8th, 2005(some idiots actually leave the year). If I really wanted to know, there are buttons that can be pushed. Returning a call where you have asked someone a specific question and you get a call back that says "I'm in now, please call me back." Oh, goodie. Most people are generally mentally challenged when it comes to using communication devices and voicemail. I was thinking of changing mine to ask people NOT to leave the time and date because I already know. There ought to be laws punishable by several years in jail-crimes against common sense. Of course, I try to avoid all of this by just using email.
The national No-Call list has helped, but I'm still inundated with calls for money from all the Police Reserves, Police Fraternal groups etc., all with unfamiliar names. When I try to remain polite and say no. they try to lay a guilt trip on me, at which point I hang up. One day, some Police organization had the nerve to CALL ME BACK and start to bawl me out for saying no ! THAT caused a real quick hang-up.
they get me at work where i have to pick up. or my son will anwser at home and yell "dad there's someone on the phone for you" i yell back tell them i am dead. i get a kick out of a 8 year old telling this human leech " my dad said to tell you he is dead, goodbye"
dukehjsteve wrote:The national No-Call list has helped, but I'm still inundated with calls for money from all the Police Reserves, Police Fraternal groups etc., all with unfamiliar names. When I try to remain polite and say no. they try to lay a guilt trip on me, at which point I hang up. One day, some Police organization had the nerve to CALL ME BACK and start to bawl me out for saying no ! THAT caused a real quick hang-up.
Once, while visiting my daughter, there was a soliciting call from one of those "police organizations". I couldn't resist the temptation and answered "she is not home, I am just robbing the place". Nothing happened.
tafnut wrote:I used to just set the phone down and leave the line open, which would prevent them from making another call, but now there's an automatic cut-off. I was thinking about investing in an airhorn . . .
At various times I was Johnny Hernandez (New Mexico); Umberto Guerrillmo (Miami); Vito Gaspucci (NYC, Philly, Providence); Sterling Morrison (yuppie personna); Johnny Walker (Texas and the south); Eldon Walker (Utah and Idaho); Johnny Red Cloud (South Dakota); and a few others that escape me.
Y'all should be glad Vito Gaspucci never called you! He was a freakin' monster!
Nowadays there are plenty of minimum-wage script-reading nimrods who don't have any other job skills to do much other than flip burgers or telemarket.
Back in the day (I was on the phone 1981-87) it was more of a craft, even an art form. I looked at it like a chess game. My style was dry and cynical.
In certain states like Texas, the "reverse psychology" pitch would work.
I'd ask the receptionist "Who is in charge of throwing the company's money away?"
Often, she'd blurt out the name of the company owner.
Then I'd ask the receptionist her name.
Once the owner got on the phone, I'd say, "Marcia tells me you're in charge of throwing the company's money away!"
If the guy laughed or admitted that he was in charge of throwing the company's money away, he was definitely a buyer!
The psychodynamics of selling on the phone were fascinating:
People listened to the cadence of a phone presentation at the same pace a baby listens to its mother's heartbeat while still in the womb.
HOW you said things was more important than WHAT you said.
The person who talked first after you asked for the order and/or a long silence usually lost.
If you could make people laugh and then ask for the order, people often would say yes reflexively.
Only those who could pitch from their heads and not from a script were those who lasted more than a couple of months.
In NYC, Philly, and Providence, the guy who talked the fastest always won. The front talk was, "I know you're busy, just give me a coupla minutes to tell ya why I'm cwollin', and I'll get outta yer hair, OK?" If the guy said OK back to me, he was definitely a buyer.
Most important was the ability to mirror the other's person's speaking style, language, diction, and pace.
Some states like New York and Florida had four or five different accents. It was hard to discern what a native Florida accent was. Northern New England had a very French-Canadian accent that was very difficult to mimic. Rural Mississippi accents (Meridian, MS especially) were very difficult to understand. The Virgin Islands had no idea what the value of an American dollar was. Such mooches!
I made $60K a year working 4-5 hours a day, usually done by the noon hour. My phone book pages were worth far more than their weight in gold. Towards the end of my career, I had permission in writing (contract negotiation ploy by yours truly) from my employer to drive around for 20 minutes at 9:30 AM to smoke a joint so my productivity wouldn't drop.
Ah, the memories ....
But back then there were "virgin towns", cities that had never been telemarketed by anyone before. People would listen, then they'd lay down and buy.
if i seem angry its because i almost got fired because of these sharks. i was new at this job and we were running out of tape. a telemarketer got thru to me in shipping and said "mr. carvey can we send that tape to you?" i figured someone had ordered it and he was asking if now was a good time to ship. anyway, when the 5,000 rolls showed up with my name referenced it was in deep sh$#$%!! had to go " up stairs" to talk to the companys controller.
they still get thru at my new job and interupt my busy day. and like i said i slam the phone down has hard as ican without breaking. it helps relieve the stress
:: If they call for you to sign up for their Family and Friends plan reply: "I don't have any friends...would you be my friend?" in as sinister a voice as possible.
:: If they clean rugs ask things like: "can you get out blood?", "can you get out HUMAN blood?", and "how about GOAT blood?".
:: Listen to their entire spiel, and feign interest when feedback is necessary (do something else in between). When they're all done and just needed your credit card number to send out the order, ask the telemarketer to marry you. When they refuse, explain you don't give your credit card number to complete strangers...
:: Tell them, in as deadpan a voice as possible, that you're not allowed to have money.
Yeah, I block those telemarketers pretty quick, like Garry. If somebody starts out the call with "William, ..." I tell them nobody who knows me has called me William since the 1st grade and hang up immediately.